Thursday, August 9, 2012
What's the goal of life as we know it? Some people say money, others say status and power, still others would argue making a difference. These goals represent different ideals, but I think they all have something in common- people want to be happy, and they feel achieving these goals will secure them that elusive carrot. I'm still relatively young, but I've been contemplating the things I want out of life and questioning my motivations/drives to achieve what I want. I definitely want to be happy, but life isn't without risk and I'm finding it hard to separate what I want from how I want others to perceive me and what I want; it's a slippery slope. I feel like I'm getting older, but have yet to achieve anything meaningful, or at least not anything that societal norms would dictate as meaningful (parenthood, financial stability, giving back). I'm starting to wonder if the whole happiness and dreams thing is just another shade of bad fantasy, and while I'm sitting here contemplating what I want and how to get it, the world is passing me by and my eggs are going bad. If I'm completely honest, I just want a loving connection with a partner who makes me feel safe (and perhaps a baby)- everything else is negotiable. Someone recently made the comment to me that happiness is a satisfied mind, and I'm not satisfied so perhaps I need to alter my approach. But how? The only thing I know for sure is that watching "I'm Having Their Baby" is not the proper activity for feeling better about my potential for true happiness in life.